An Introduction

My name is Ryan (selected after a character from The O.C. who was the pinnacle of masculinity when I was growing up). I am (at this time) a 27 year old transman living on the Canadian West Coast. I grew up in a small town and I did not know what a transgender person was until I was in grade 12 and within two weeks of that discovery I was contacting doctors and making appointments to begin my own transition. The majority of my knowledge was acquired through YouTube channels, particularly that of Skylar Kergil, though there are many incredible resources and personalities out there to connect with in this age of social media.

I began hormone replacement therapy (HRT) in October 2010 after undergoing three months of "gender therapy" which consisted of three sessions with a therapist named Julian Young who I do not believe is practicing anymore (or Google suggests he isn't). My initial testosterone prescription was with an endocrinologist based out of St. Anthony's clinic in Langford, BC who I don't recall the name of. I moved to Vancouver, BC in 2012 and switched to the Catherine White Holman All-Gender Wellness Centre (CWHWC) for my medical needs, which was a lovely clinic run entirely by volunteers and while they still exist they have cut down on the services they offer but can be an excellent resource for navigating your own transition and helping you locate the care that you need. I currently reside in Victoria, BC, though my doctor, Karina Zeidler, is still located in Vancouver.

I had top surgery at Victoria Surgery with Dr. Chris Taylor on February 10, 2016. I had discussed going on the waiting list for top surgery with my gender therapist in 2010 and after a few years had passed without any news I inquired to my physician at CWHWC to discover that I was not on the waitlist, meaning I had to restart the process. I had a bilateral concentric double mastectomy (also referred to as the keyhole method), meaning I do not have the long scars across my chest that is common with female-to-male (FTM) top surgery. I have ended up with some strange pockets of skin at the sides of my chest but I decided not to go back for revisions. Ultimately I am happy with the result of my top surgery.

The purpose of this blog is mainly to document the process of seeking bottom surgery at the new clinic opening in Vancouver, BC because I have scoured the internet for the experiences of transmen in my general area on their surgical journeys and have found the content to be extremely scarce and lacking. I have also had friends, colleagues, educators, and acquaintances reach out to me over the years seeking resources to pass on and I have been disappointed in my ability to provide the most concise and helpful information, especially as my own journey has been largely independent and I want to ease the stress of someone else undergoing the same thing. So the content will largely be FTM bottom-surgery focused but I will provide my own occasional musings on my transition and field any inquiries about transition to the best of my ability.

I have been extremely fortunate in my transition in that I have not faced any particularly brutal discrimination or harassment and that is partly due to the fact that I have been "passing" since even before I began HRT, which I know is very rare. I was always a "tom boy" growing up, I wore boy's clothing, I asked my mom to cut my hair short when I was four years old, and I recently stumbled upon an envelope explaining a little bit about this tucked away at her house.

I consider myself to be a "semi-open" transperson, as I don't disclose this information to coworkers, I left my job before my top surgery instead of telling them what my situation was and I don't speak often about my transition in public or even to my friends. Until recently, I did not have trans peers to exchange experiences with, and the few people I have connected with are male-to-female (MTF) so while similar, the experiences do differ drastically. The people who know me are aware of my gender identity and even if you don't know me well you may have picked up on a nod or two on my social media accounts.

So my general intention will all of this is education, especially as this clinic will be still be quite new by the time my surgery rolls around and there won't be a lot (if any) accounts of people's experiences there. Please feel free to reach out with any questions you might have, regardless of your status of transition, or even if you aren't transitioning and are curious about learning more about the process, and I will be happy to answer to the best of my ability.

Thanks for you attention,

Ryan